Let's Go Swimming....

"Now Kiddies, I have arranged for to all go svimming! Isn't that vonderful? We
can go on an ancient coach, roll around in the snow and wear nothing but a vin
the meedle of Winter! Are you all excited?"

*Insert an hour's break in which we all took the mick out of
her and that
certain infamous photo took place*

[We're all sitting in the lobby, chatting, after dinner that
night]

[Marta approaches us all at random]

"... kiddy, are you going svimming? WELL GET ON THE BUS!!! How
about you, kiddy? Are you going svimming like a little SALMON? Well... GET ON
THE BUS!"

She grabbed this particuarly bewildered looking student and
literally throws him through the porch, out onto the coach.

[she runs onto the coach, looking ferverished and stressed with
us all]

"...kiddies, vhere have you all been? I mean, five minutes late?
Not bad. Ten minutes? OK? BUT FIFTEEN MINUTES? KIDDIES? WHAT WERE YOU THINING?
You stupid kiddies! Now, let us go roll in snow."

[We all got to the pool and to our most sweet relief, Marta did
not actually join us in the pool, although one of our Sixth formers was suicidal
enough to roll around in the snow, only to then go and jump in the 40 degrees
centigrade [115 fahranheit, as a guess]

In the next edition I may not actually tell you a Marta story but a weird little side story which kinda sprung from the Swimming pool disaster. Also, in future reading, watch out for the trauma that was our X Factor Night in which several people took the Mick out of Marta.